Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

by - October 18, 2018

You know how sometimes we see someone, and you automatically admire or envy them? Because for some reason you tell yourself that you’re not as good or as successful; not as pretty or as smart as them... I know that that is something a lot of us can relate to. But let’s try to figure this out and turn the tables around, so to speak. 


The next time you find yourself admiring someone else or feeling envious of them, ask yourself what exactly are the traits that you like or admire or are envious of.


Instead of being envious, try to think of it this way: maybe you’re inspired by them. So, focus on the traits that make you feel so strongly. People see the world in a way that connects back to ourselves without even knowing it. So, you may not even realize it, but everything you see, or notice, already reflects who you are.

Write those traits down because the reality is, what you see/admire in others, is what you have within yourself already. So, instead of comparing yourself and putting yourself down, realize that what you are seeing in those people, is what you have within yourself as well.

Those traits want to come out, they just need you to believe in yourself. So, now that you know everything reflects you, and you’re no longer letting that comparison trap make you feel insecure, let it empower you. Accept your flaws and accept that you are more than enough, and you have the power to change not only your life but others as well.

Remind yourself that other people’s “outsides” aren't always what they seem.

This is such an important thing to factor in. Unless you know for sure, you can’t use people's "online" appearance to judge the reality of their life. People select carefully what it is they wish to show on social media (their audience), and do the same with the lives they live in public. You may have had a similar experience, as I have, of being left speechless when a couple that appeared to be happy and solid, announce their divorce. So, wish others well, always, but, if ever their life gives you a reason to feel bad about yours, remind yourself that you don’t actually know what goes on behind closed doors.


Be grateful for the good in your life, and resist your inner voice that shouts “It’s not enough.”

If you try to be grateful for what’s good in your life and remind yourself of it daily, you’ll be far less vulnerable to comparison and envy. If someone or something triggers that ugly feeling of negativity, stop and remind yourself of all the good in your life. There is so much to be grateful and thankful for <3



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20 comments

  1. Absolutely! I am so grateful for everything in my life. Even the tough times. Bc they have taught me to live a purposeful life. Https://therapistmarriedtonavy.com/

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  2. Very thought provoking! I love this line "what you see/admire in others, is what you have within yourself already."

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  3. Best read today! I seem to do that to myself daily! comparison is the thief of joy!

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  4. This is something many due. I loved your post and I shared as well. Just be happy with you.

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  5. When I was unemployed, this was a really hard concept for me. I was doing everything I could to find a job, and I was working really hard, but because I wasn't working full time like others my age, it never felt like enough. I had to really sit down with myself and reflect on all I was doing. It's hard to shake that feeling sometimes, but it is possible! These tips are super helpful.

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    1. Hi, Shannon. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment Xo I, myself, am in the same boat right now. I've been unemployed for quite some time, so I remind myself of this daily so not to stress as much. It is most definitely difficult! <3

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  6. This act of comparing yourself to others sabotages your present happiness. if we stop this unhealthy practice, we will learn to accept ourselves as we are and be content.

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  7. Comparing is such a hard habit to break. Great post. Thanks for sharing.

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  8. I wonder why most people dont understand this simple fact. Like could be so much easier for everyone!

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    1. It's very difficult, it took me a very long time to come to terms with this, and I'm still learning and having to constantly remind myself :)

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  9. I have a horrible time not comparing myself to others! This is a great reminder, as it only can create anxiety and make you feel bad for yourself for now reason. Thanks for this!

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    1. Don't we all? I often find myself comparing my life to others when I scroll through Instagram for too long, it's a vicious cycle I am determined to break! :)

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  10. That was so me!! She's better she's prettier she's more popular....I would drive myself mental. Not anymore. I'm awesome just as I am and everyone else is just as awesome. We all have something that makes us great! Great post!

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    1. You're absolutely right! Love your comment! :) Xo

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  11. Such a wonderful post! So often I feel discouraged because it feels like there is no way I can keep up with all the other bloggers out there but like you said, instead of feeling envious or even discouraged, I should choose to feel inspired instead. :) xx

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